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'Nothing prepares you': The invisible lives of carers in the UK
West London, UK – It was a rainy evening, and my mother and I were at home watching a Bollywood comedy when I received a call from the hospital.After months of medical appointments and misdiagnoses, part of me wanted to ignore it. Instead, I went upstairs to answer. The doctor was calling to say my mother’s bone marrow results were back, and we had to go into the hospital the next day.The call left me anxious, but when I told my mother about the appointment, I tried to be reassuring. “Don’t worry, Mum, it’ll be clear, nothing serious,” I said.The next morning, the hospital waiting area was quiet. No patients. Just the hum of the building. We sat side by side, facing the wall.When my mother’s name was called, we entered a small room with stark white walls, two chairs, and barely any space to breathe. The doctor calmly explained that the results showed myeloma, a rare blood cancer. Treatment had to start immediately.I sat there frozen as my mother began asking questions.My mother, then 72, would start with weekly chemotherapy sessions for two months. The doctor handed me a sheet listing the side effects – nausea, fatigue, weakness, and weight loss. Chemotherapy would drain my mother, who was already slight, and she would need to rest.Sitting in that small room, I realised then that life had shifted. My ageing father wouldn’t be able to help much, and my older brother is estranged from us. I would be doing this solo, a single woman with no partner to turn to, caring for the person who had always cared for me. I would no longer be my mother’s child, but her carer.Minreet with her parents, Rajinder and Pritpal, at their gurdwara in October 2024. For her birthday, Minreet held a prayer at the temple in gratitude for her mum entering remission after six months of treatment [Courtesy of Minreet Kaur]Losing a sense of selfWe left the hospital overwhelmed. When we returned to our terraced house in West London, I sat my father, Rajinder, down in our small living room and told him about the diagnosis. He looked confused and turned to his wife, mumbling, “Pritpal, don’t worry,” and “keep the faith”, before heading upstairs to pray as part of his daily routine.Later that day, flowers arrived. My mother, suffering from back and chest pain and fatigue, had been on sick leave from her retail assistant job, and her colleagues had sent her a bouquet to cheer her up. She broke down, thinking they knew about her diagnosis.“I don’t want to give up work,” she told me, tears in h...
Unpaid carers: supporting carers or subsidising state failure?
The debate in briefThere are an estimated 10.6 million unpaid carers in the UK. Carers UK estimates the economic value of unpaid care in England and Wales at around 162 billion pounds a year -- more than total annual NHS spending in England. In return, those who qualify for Carer's Allowance receive 83.30 pounds a week, the lowest benefit of its kind, for a minimum of 35 hours of care. Charities support these carers with respite, peer networks, information, and advocacy. But the question beneath all of this is whether that support helps sustain a system that structurally undervalues care.Quick takeawaysQuestionAnswerHow many unpaid carers are there in the UK?An estimated 10.6 million (Carers UK). The 2021 Census recorded 5.0 million in England and Wales.What is their care worth economically?Around 162 billion pounds a year in England and Wales (Carers UK, 2024).What is Carer's Allowance?83.30 pounds a week for people providing 35+ hours of unpaid care, subject to means-testing and an earnings limit.Is the support adequate?No. Carer's Allowance is the lowest benefit of its kind, and social care has been cut substantially since 2010.What do charities do for carers?Respite, information, peer support, benefits guidance, and campaigning for policy change.Is the situation improving?Marginally. The earnings limit has been raised, but fundamental reform of social care funding remains undelivered.The argumentsThe case for charity-led carer supportThe social care system is not meeting need at anything close to the scale required. Local authority spending on adult social care fell substantially in real terms per person from 2010, with the Health Foundation and Institute for Government documenting significant cuts through the austerity decade before partial recovery in later years. Carers UK's State of Caring 2024 found that 68% of unpaid carers reported negative impacts on their mental health, 60% on their physical health, and 44% were struggling financially. Charities' response -- peer support, short breaks, counselling, benefits advice -- is what stands between many carers and complete breakdown.Charity-led support also reaches people the state misses. Young carers, estimated at 800,000 by the Children's Society, are frequently invisible to statutory services. Charities like the Carers Trust identify these children and provide support that schools and social services often miss entirely.The case that charity support masks structural failureUnpaid care is massively ...
"Adults at 16": Children caring for children and the Invisible burden ...
While most 16-17-year-olds are concerned with exams or their first night out, a significant portion of Generation Z lives a parallel reality. These are the "young carers," adolescents who take on adult responsibilities—from paying bills and housework to caring for younger siblings or sick parents—before they even have the right to vote.
Unprepared, uninformed, uninspired: navigating the care cliff edge ...
Imagine this. You're 17. You've just been told by your social worker or foster carer that you're no longer going to be living with them. A place you've called home. A place where you've felt safe, maybe even with carers you've come to see as mum and dad. And now, you're being told you're moving. Somewhere new. Unfamiliar. Possibly miles away. Unprepared. Uninformed. And ...
